


Between stimulus and response

by wannabequeen



Category: Friends at the Table (Podcast)
Genre: Gardens & Gardening, Getting Together, M/M, Multi, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-23
Updated: 2020-01-23
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:07:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,131
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22356130
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wannabequeen/pseuds/wannabequeen
Summary: A Secret Samol gift for Elestaus, for the prompt: throndir is common-law married to two different men and both are important to him. something describing / depicting how the three of them came together during the cold winter game or how they learned to live with each other after the second springI chose the second spring.
Relationships: Ephrim/Red Jack/Throndir (Friends at the Table)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 12
Collections: Secret Samol 2019





	Between stimulus and response

**Author's Note:**

  * For [elestaus](https://archiveofourown.org/users/elestaus/gifts).



Throndir learns that Ephrim has left his tower from a child who can't whisper. 

Ephrim is walking through the street, holding his head high and his jaw tight. He walks silently, and alone. He doesn't have his retainers with him, and as people see him they fall quiet and watchful. After he has passed, they erupt into furious whispers. 

And Throndir, he may not be the Ranger anymore, but he can still track quarry that obvious. 

Throndir finds Ephrim at a small house, a cottage really. He is standing with his Spring arm across his body, holding on to the other elbow. 

"Guess I'll be here now," Ephrim says without turning around.

"Yeah," Throndir says. Then, hesitantly "You're always welcome at my place. And the library. You don't have to be alone."

Ephrim snorts and walks to the door. When he puts his Spring hand on the doorknob, he stops for a moment. But then he opens it, steps into the dim space, and closes the door behind him.

Throndir is no fool. He sighs, and Kodiak butts his head into Throndir’s thigh. "Yeah, I know," he says, burying his hand in Kodiak’s ruff.

They turn and walk away. 

***

A week later, Ephrim comes to the library. He looks around the section on the plants of Spring, and flips through a few before picking one. He heads to the desk where Throndir is working on the almanac and takes a seat across from him. He seems to be making eye contact with Throndir’s left ear. 

“Sorry I was so short with you, last time. I was, I am, trying to work a lot of stuff out.”

Throndir puts a slip of paper into his book and shuts it quietly. “I know, Ephrim. You really are still welcome, with me at least.”

“I think I’d rather keep a low profile, you know? Maybe you can come over some time?”

“Sure, man. Yeah, I’d like that.”

“Well, I’ll. See you around, I guess.” Ephrim taps the table twice, and gets up to go. 

After he’s left, Throndir realizes that he didn’t even take the book with him. 

He uses that as an excuse to go by the next day, which clearly surprises Ephrim, but after that, it seems like a barrier has broken. Throndir starts visiting pretty regularly. 

***

Sometimes on days when it’s sticky-hot and tempers are short, Red Jack and Throndir gather up some of the kids and bring them to the waterfall. There had been a community governance meeting a few months after Ephrim’s move to the cottage, and it was clear that if the children didn’t have some way to blow off their energy, nothing would ever get done. In a move of desperation, Red Jack had offered to take the kids swimming, and enough of them wanted to go that Throndir had jumped in to help.

But the kids had fun, and the grownups were glad to get a quiet afternoon. So now it’s a regular thing. Throndir is teaching some of the younger ones basic things, like how to float on their backs and hold their breath. On the other side of the pool, six or seven older kids are hanging off of Red Jack and giggling as he swings his arms around and shouts.

“I am Red Jack, The Great Oni, the last of my name, and I have defeated foes far greater than you children! It takes more than this to fell me!”

Three more ‘sneak up’ on him from behind, giggling and splashing, but he pretends not to notice them. Two jump up and grab his shoulders, and one goes underwater to poke at the backs of his knees. Red Jack lets himself fall over in slow motion with a roar, dunking all of the screaming kids as well. They immediately start throwing sticks for Kodiak, who gamely swims after them, as Red Jack comes over to Throndir.

“Want to show me your progress?” Red Jack asks a little girl who has been working on her swim-kicks for months. She’s almost there, and Throndir is so proud of her. She squeaks and heads for shore, feet doing more to splash than propel her. The water she kicks up doesn’t hit Red Jack’s face, but it does run down his chest and stomach, and before Throndir lets himself follow the droplets further, Red Jack clears his throat. 

“Excellent job!” He shouts after her. More quietly, to Throndir, he says, “You have more patience than I. Especially when you’re so short, and must take that splash in the face!” 

His grin makes it clear that he’s joking, so Throndir gasps in mock indignation.

“How dare you insult me in such a way! I must be avenged!” he yells, and spins around to create a wave big enough to get Red Jack. 

“You knave, this is war!” Red Jack declares. One of the big kids screams “SPLASH FIGHT!!” , another one jumps in from a big rock to get everyone around them, Kodiak starts barking, and it’s clear Throndir’s swim lessons are finished for the day. 

“For honor!” He shouts, and a battalion of little kids follows him into battle.

***

One day when Throndir goes to the cottage to visit, he finds Ephrim in the front yard. He’s sitting on the ground next to some mangled boards with nails sticking out, looking disheveled and exhausted. He looks up as Throndir approaches, and gives a little wave.

“Throndir, hey, I was trying to build trellises but I gave myself three splinters and these definitely aren’t structurally sound…”

Throndir crouches down and picks up one of the boards. “You can just try again. Want help?”

“I would love that,” Ephrim says, and hands Throndir the diagram he had been using. It’s clearly hand-drawn, with lots of cross-outs and scribbly arrows.

Thronir takes it, and squints at it for a while. He turns it, and makes some thinking sounds, and then looks up at Ephrim with a serious expression.

“Eph, I’ve got to tell you that I don’t know what the hell this is supposed to be. Do you have any schematics that are any good?”

Ephrim bursts out into laughter, high and and clear like a bell. Throndir realizes that this is the first time in ages that Ephrim has been allowed to mess up, and suddenly Throndir starts laughing too, big and deep, in a way he hasn’t in a long time. It feels like a breeze clearing away a fog of pollen, when everyone can take a deep breath for the first time in days. 

***

After about a year, Ephrim reads a book about effective gardening techniques at the library, and then he finds six more and decides he needs to do all of it right this second. So he enlists Red Jack and Throndir to come by with shovels to dig rows that go along the contours of the topography instead of straight lines. His Spring arm doesn’t really have the strength to do that kind of thing, he says with big pleading eyes, so he can’t help, but it’s really important. Throndir falls for it hook, line, and sinker.

Ephrim is wearing a big floppy sunhat and sitting in a chair, watching them dig and offering cool drinks, as they get progressively sweatier and dirtier. Red Jack is down to his fundoshi and Throndir is down to his braies by the time they’re done. Ephrim washes their hands with cold water, and gives them damp cloths to cool their foreheads. He also rubs healing cream on their cheeks and shoulders, where they had gotten too much sun and it was hot to the touch. 

No one comments on how Ephrim lets his hands linger.

***

Throndir wakes up to a rock hitting his window, and when he looks out, Red Jack is mounted on Ace.

“Hold on,” Throndir stage-whispers. Kodiak raises his head, but Throndir pats him and he goes back to sleep. Kodiak isn’t as young as he used to be, gray around the muzzle, and isn’t really up for midnight runs anymore. He’s fine, it’s not unexpected. After all, Throndir himself is a little creaky in the knees these days. 

Throndir pulls on trousers and his boots and hustles down the stairs and steps into the cool moonlight. It’s dark enough that everything seems to be in black-and-white, even the garnet of Red Jack’s skin. His face is in shadow, hard to read.

“Blue J has been gone for a long time, I’m restless. So I’m going for a ride.” Red Jack explains.

“I guessed, what with you being on Ace and everything.”

“Would you like to join me?”

“If Ace consents to a second rider.”

Ace huffs, and dips his head to bonk Throndir’s shoulder.

“What? I’m just being polite!” Throndir says, rubbing the space between Ace’s ears.

Red Jack leans down to offer him a hand, and Throndir swings up behind him. He reaches his arms around Red Jack’s belly for stability as Red Jack clicks his tongue and Ace starts moving. They speed up once they’re out of town, and Throndir squeezes a little tighter. 

Riding with Red Jack gets disorienting - something about the way he and Ace move together, it’s almost as if the world is moving and they are standing still. Throndir presses his face between Red Jack’s shoulder blades, and takes deep breaths in time with Ace and with Red Jack. 

He can’t say how much time passes like that, but when he looks again to the sky, a sun is starting to rise, the walls of the University are visible in the distance, and two familiar adventurers are ahead of them on the road.

Benjamin and Blue J are home. 

***

One day when they’re sitting in the garden, Kodiak comes trotting up to Throndir and woofs. Throndir and Ephrim get up and follow him to a spot a little ways away, where Kodiak sniffs a spot and then woofs again. Throndir walks over, and sees a little bird in the grass.

“Opa, hello there, baby!” Throndir scoops up the fledgeling, small and delicate in his big brown hands. He holds it close to his face and runs a thumb over its head. “Let’s get you safe back to mama,” he says softly, more to himself than to the bird or Ephrim. Then, “where do you think she came from?”

When Ephrim doesn’t respond, Throndir looks up. Ephrim has an expression on his face that he’s never seen. It is soft, and warm, and sad, and Throndir doesn’t understand it at all. Then Ephrim smiles, and says “I guess we should look, she can’t have flown too far,” and sets off looking for promising looking trees.

They find her nest eventually, and Ephrim sits on Throndir’s shoulders to put her back in. Throndir doesn’t think about the thighs tight against his head, or the little tug on his hair when Ephrim is ready to get down.

“Speaking of baby birds out of their nests, how’s Blue J?” Ephrim asks as they head back towards the house. 

“Oh! They’re great, last time they came back they had family dinner with Red Jack and I. They’re growing to be as great a storyteller as their dad, it’s amazing. There’s so much happening out there, Ephrim, you wouldn’t believe it. Remember when I told you about the cobbin settlement they found?”

Ephrim nods, and oohs and aahs at the right places, while Throndir tells him about Benjamin and Blue J’s latest adventures. He’s always so happy to talk about them, his gestures growing wide and his face soft, that Ephrim doesn’t mind that he’s heard most of these things three times already. 

***

Ephrim comes into the library carefully holding two envelopes. He looks around as if he was expecting someone else, before handing one to Throndir. 

“Do you know where Red Jack is?”

“Last I heard, he was fishing by the waterfall, why?”

“Thanks,” Ephrim says, and hurries out, presumably to the waterfall. 

Throndir shakes his head and opens the envelope. In the fanciest writing he has ever seen, it reads

Please do me the honor of attending dinner at my home in two nights’ time, in celebration of the first fruits of my garden this season

.

Two days later, Throndir knocks on Ephrim’s door, wearing his nicest shirt. The door opens, and over Ephrim’s shoulder, Throndir can see Red Jack preparing an enormous piece of fish. 

“Does he expect us to eat that whole thing?” Throndir whispers to Ephrim.

Ephrim just shrugs, and swings his body to allow Throndir in.

With every course he serves, Ephrim tells them which ingredients are from the garden. Throndir is surprised by how much of it they were there for - almost everything they eat, either he or Red Jack had helped it to grow, by digging or weeding or watering, or a million other small tasks that added up. 

After dinner, they end up singing. It’s one of those folk songs with a thousand verses that has traveled a thousand miles, and even though they all know slightly different versions, it still sounds good. Red Jack is drumming on the table with his hands, Ephrim is swaying and tapping his foot against Throndir’s ankle, and Throndir can’t tell if the warmth in his body is from the fire in Ephrim’s stove or the fondness he feels.

***

Throndir writes Hella a letter updating her on how it’s going in the University, the things Lem has brought him for the library, what’s growing in Ephrim’s garden. At the very end, without letting himself think too hard, he asks “How exactly did you and Adelaide and Adaire figure out your whole situation?”

Hella writes back, “A lot of not talking about it, and then I almost died. After that, there was a lot of talking. Good luck, buddy.”

***

It’s a quiet day, and it’s cool in the library, dust floating around on gentle breezes. Red Jack is helping Throndir shelve books, humming a tune that Throndir doesn’t know. They work well together. They’ve done this a hundred times in the years since Throndir dissolved the Golden Lance, and nothing is very special about it, except that Throndir finds himself noticing how comfortable it feels.

“Hey, Red Jack.” Throndir says quietly.

“Hmm?”

“Have you ever loved more than one person at once?”

Red Jack looks down from where he was placing his armload of books. “I have lived a long time, and traveled a long ways. A being like me thrives on connection and novelty. I have loved many people, simultaneously and separately.”

“How did it go?”

Red Jack pauses for a moment, and taps a claw on the cover of the book he’s holding. “Some of those relationships flourished, and some withered, and in all cases I have had to move on. Things end, Throndir, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t start them.”

“Huh.” The silence hangs, awkward, until Throndir starts bustling around and says, “Hey, hand me those books?”

“Sure.”

Red Jack goes back to humming, but it doesn’t feel quite as casual any more. 

***

Blue J comes jogging up to Throndir and Red Jack as they’re finishing a lengthy goodbye outside of the library. 

“Oh, good, both of you are here. Don’t make too big a deal about it, but me and Benjamin want to do a wedding kind of thing.”

Throndir grabs at Blue J’s hands and squeezes, bouncing up and down on his toes. “That’s amazing, Blue!” he says, as Red Jack gathers them both in his arms and utters a wordless, excited yell. When they settle down a little, Blue J continues.

“We’re planning it, but I was wondering, in the ceremony, would you walk me down the aisle? Benjamin is going to ask his mom and dad, and it would feel good to have both of you up there with me.”

“Gosh, Blue, I --”

“WE WOULD LOVE TO!” Red Jack thunders. He squeezes his arms tighter around them and lifts them off the ground, spinning as if Blue J were little again and Throndir were a much smaller man. Blue J laughs and kicks their feet until Red Jack puts them down, winded and a little dizzy.

“Great, good.” Blue J turns to Throndir and puts a hand on his shoulder. “Throndir, can you ask Ephrim if he’ll officiate? I know he doesn’t really do church stuff anymore, but… we’d like it.”

Throndir is too overwhelmed to really process it, but he mutters something about being willing to try. After Red Jack yells a little more, Blue J heads off to talk to someone else, and he turns back to look at Throndir.

They meet eyes, and Throndir bursts into giggles. “Blue J’s getting married!” he says. “Married!”

***

When Throndir asks, Ephrim is baffled. 

“But why not someone else, like, uh, anyone Benjamin doesn’t hate? Hadrian?”

“Hadrian has another role in the ceremony, so does Rosana, and it’s not like he’s going to ask Lem. I don’t really understand why they want me doing what I’m doing either. Allow them the dignity of their choice, Eph.” 

Ephrim closes his eyes and takes a deep breath in through his nose, and breathes out through his mouth. Throndir watches his chest rise and fall a few more times before Ephrim opens his eyes again. “Fine. Sure. But you’re not allowed to pick your outfit, you’ll probably wear those brown pants you’ve had for a decade.”

“Hey, they’re comfortable, and it’s easy to move in them! What more do you want from me?” Throndir laughs. 

“Something that makes you look good, you fool. It’s an important occasion, I just want you to look the part. Do you know what colors Blue J is wearing?”

***

The day comes. 

Throndir and Red Jack are each holding one of Blue J’s hands as they walk down one bough of the rhizome. As they get closer to the clearing where Ephrim and the community is waiting, they catch sight of Benjamin holding hands with his parents, coming from a different branch. 

They’re moving slowly, Hadrian careful about where he’s putting his feet, and Benjamin is wearing robes that feel so, so familiar. When they get close enough, Throndir realizes that the embroidery is the same as Fantasmo had on his clothing. Benjamin is wearing an icy blue instead of the tired purple Fantasmo had worn, but the cut and the edging are the same, and Throndir feels his heart lurch at the reminder of all the people who aren’t here. 

They meet in the center, where Ephrim is waiting. He is glowing, beautiful as the late-afternoon sun filters through the trees to perfectly frame his face. As he turns to grin at them, Throndir realizes that something has changed, more than just the kids growing up and making things formal.

Blue J and Benjamin let go of their parents, and step forward to clasp hands in front of Ephrim. Throndir grabs Red Jack’s hand, and Red Jack squeezes back hard.

“Dearly beloved,” Ephrim begins.

***

Later, after the ceremony, after the dinner, once Lem has taken out his fiddle and someone else has produced a guitar, Red Jack and Throndir stand in the trees at the edge of the clearing, watching people dance.

"I have seen many things, Throndir. And never once did I think that I would live to see my child, grown, their own person, pledged in love and devotion to another."

"Mmm. I never really expected to have -- to help raise a kid, at all. Let alone one as great as Blue J."

Red Jack turns from watching the dancing couple to look at Throndir.

"You can say that they're yours too, Throndir. They didn't ask you to participate in this ceremony because you were the Ranger before them. You are more in their life than an archery teacher."

Throndir blinks a few times, still facing the dance floor.

"You have been more in my life than my child's mentor. You are a part of this family, as surely as Benjamin is. And, well. You know, a thing I told you a long time ago is, you can’t choose your family, or your best friend. But you can choose the people you love, the ones that become family."

Red Jack puts his hand on of Throndir's shoulder and squeezes. Throndir raises his hand to cover Red Jack's, and remembers another time they stood like this. A time when that squeeze meant goodbye. He looks up at Red Jack, biting a lip.

"It is not only Blue Jay's love that ties you to us."

The lights hung around the area twinkle in Red Jack's eyes. He brings his other hand to Throndir's jaw and runs a thumb along his bottom lip. Red Jack leans down as Throndir rises to his toes, meeting in the middle for a soft kiss.

Someone gasps behind them. Throndir turns, but he only sees the edge of a crimson cloak flick around a tree.

"Shit. I'll. I'll be right back, I think, I just. I just have to." Throndir falters for a moment, waves a hand as if that encompasses everything he cannot say.

"Go, Throndir. I am in no hurry, and have no desire to see him hurt." He squeezes his hand on his shoulder again, and then gives a little push.

Throndir finds Ephrim fussing with the flowers growing on the path back to the University. In the light from the party filtering through the trees, Ephrim's shadow is long and tired-looking.

"I think these plants have depleted the nutrients in the soil, we -- I should remember to bring some compost. I'm not sure the best way to work it in, I was thi--"

"Ephrim. I don't know what you saw, exactly, but it wasn't --"

"Wasn't you kissing Red Jack? I know we never talked about it, but I thought we were... Moving towards something."

"I've thought we've been moving towards something for, like, fifteen years, Ephrim. And I've thought you knew how I felt about Red Jack too, and it was okay. I mean, I went to find him when he left without warning back before... before Hella and Adaire left, and you didn't question it then."

"I wasn't allowed to feel anything about you then!" Ephrim stops touching the flowers, and straightens up to look at Throndir. His eyes are shiny, and his movements jerky.

"What do you mean? Did I ever make it seem unwelcome? It certainly wasn't!"

"We were leaders of the university, Throndir! If I had feelings, it meant our partnership could have been in jeopardy, and I couldn't let that happen. The Last University needed us, and it meant that I needed to ignore that part of myself. I understood why you left -- Red Jack has been part of this team since we got here, and I know. I know you had something for him, with him, before we even met. It hurt, but I understood, but now. Now that isn’t true, nothing is counting on us, and you came to visit me when no one else was willing to. I thought I knew what it meant, but maybe I didn't."

"Ephrim, I. You absolute goof, I didn't know you had made yourself that rule!"

Ephrim flushes pink high in his cheeks. "Well, now you're together I guess, and very happy, congratulations. Finders keepers, losers weepers, just don't ask me to officiate your wedding too!" He spins on his heel, cape and skirts flying out dramatically as he stalks away.

Throndir jogs to catch up with him. "Ephrim, wait!" He grabs the corner of Ephrim's sleeve and then takes his hand.

"What more can you possibly say to me?" Ephrim whispers.

Throndir makes a wounded sound and reaches his other hand for Ephrim's face. "You never wavered during the worst years of our lives. I will follow your lead. If you never want me to bring this up again, I won't. But I love you, Eph, and I don't want to miss this over something this stupid."

And for the second time that night, Throndir finds himself being kissed by a man he's loved for over a decade. Ephrim is holding him a little weirdly, and his face is wet, but it's beautiful all the same.

"Come on," Throndir says, pulling back and taking his hand. "I want to dance."

***

We zoom out. We see Throndir and Ephrim return, and walk up to Red Jack. We hear Red Jack laugh, and watch the three of them go into the woods. When they return, Throndir between them and holding each of their hands, his nice new shirt is just a little wrinklier than before. Blue J catches his eye and winks. Throndir grins, and just winks back.

**Author's Note:**

> I had so much fun writing this, thank you Elestaus for the prompt! I tried to write something set in the cold winter but it was just so bleak I couldn't. I also tried to include a scene of Red Jack doing a bug rodeo, because I thought it would be hilarious, but I just couldn't fit it in. So that's my final gift: bug-cowboy red jack hanging onto a big bug for dear life, while Throndir watches in delighted horror.
> 
> Title from a quote from Viktor E Frankl: Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom. 
> 
> I had trouble making a clear timeline here but this took place over the course of a long time, I was imagining the commitment ceremony when Benjamin and Blue J are at least 23-ish, probably older.


End file.
